There’s been a lot of scary going around lately. And it seems that it is polarizing us into two very different camps. There’s either the “be nice to everyone” camp or “burn it all” camp. I’m seem to be finding myself in the middle ground. And I’m quickly learning that my voice, and the voice of those who stand in this proverbial no-man’s-land with me, often have our voices dimmed and muffled by the roars from others.
Let me clarify my stance on feeling in the middle ground here. It’s not that I don’t want to be nice to everyone, and I definitely don’t’ want to see it all burn, but I think a person is required to entertain at least a piece of both those elements to have an objective impact on the world. The world certainly becomes immensely scarier without the kindness fueling the desire to be nice to all. At the same time, the passion that ignites the letting it burn mentality is what drives change to social injustices. It all comes down to balancing the two and know when to let one drive take over the other.
Can’t we all play nice?
This is something that has plagued me for some time. They ‘why’ some aren’t able to be respectful and kind in their interactions, or at the very least, just ignore what the other jerks have to say. But then I remember, we all have different life experiences. Each of us deals with different stressors on a daily basis. We are human.
Compound that with the fact that much of our human interaction these days happens via a screen and internet connection, and you have the recipe for a real shit storm. How many times has every single one of us misinterpreted someone while just talking face-to-face? How many more times has that happened while reading someone’s social media post? If you said zero, you are lying. Because all of those different human experiences I mentioned before means we have vastly different ways of expressing ourselves and hearing others. All of these components come into play when figuring out why someone else appears to always have a stick up their ass. Maybe they do, but maybe they just don’t interact the same way you do.
Why can’t I just let it burn?
Well, you could. But doesn’t all the angst that comes with that mentality just eat away at your soul? Personally, I don’t want to spend all my time mad at the world. Anger breads fear, and fear breads bad behavior and even poorer decisions. It doesn’t mean I don’t have days that all I do is angst and grump and rage at everything, but I try to limit those days. They happen, yeah. Doesn’t mean I want to unpack and live in that mind space.
In the same breath, I have to say, when you see those comments, have those moments that build up that inner fire. . .use it. Those emotions almost always come from witnessing some social injustice, crappy behavior of a fellow human being, or some unthinkable atrocity our world seems to be plagued with these days. Instead of turning that rage towards others, harness it. Turn it into a drive to do something better than what you just witnessed. Again, I understand human nature doesn’t always allow for this, at least not immediately. Once you’ve cussed out your teddy bear, stomped your feet a bit, and punched the ever living daylights out of a pillow, take the rest of that rage and transform it into passion to go out and make a difference. You’ll wind up feeling better, and the world at large will benefit from your do-gooding ways. Don’t ignore the atrocities. Just try to counteract them.
So I should be nice, but not too nice. What’s left?
Use that passion inside to stand up for the things you truly believe in. Speak up when you know something is wrong and talk back when you encounter a truly vile human being. Because, let’s face it, some people really don’t care. Guess what? Those people probably aren’t worth your time anyways. The ones that do need speaking up to, they probably won’t listen. But someone will be. There is always someone listening when you speak up with good intentions on behalf of the blighted, wronged, and less fortunate. Those that are listening are why you speak up.
At the end of the day, the human element means there will be misunderstandings. There will be moments we can’t stand each other. There will be times when all we want to do is watch it burn. So take these musings to mull over and try to temper your reactions before lashing out at a seemingly opposite opinion to your own next time you come across one. Maybe the other party didn’t express themselves well. Maybe you had a brain fart and read words out of order. Hell, maybe the both of you are just having really awful days and need to take a step back before you engage with the public. No judgements. It is not advisable for me to interact with any living creature pre-morning coffee. No matter the potential list of reasons, keep in mind you’re not just talking to some cosmic entity on the other side a screen. There is a person behind those words. And generally, most of us have feelings and forces that drive how we behave and interact with others. Always remember the human element.
This post is primarily for me starting off on another year of life. If you happen to find some tidbit of wisdom in the words, all the better.
J. Hendrix Creative 